Because Dave Winer Said So…
That means nothing to you, but a great deal to me.
Ten coaches down and two to go. I always save Bruiser until the end, because I usually need a laugh at this point. There’s so much information and so many standard issue quotes to sort through to get to the good stuff, I get worn out. Bruiser is always fresh and funny.
Some themes have emerged. You can guess who the other coach that is not yet on the record.
Old Dominion: Cowboy Up. Yeah that’s old and quite stupid, but Blaine Taylor is the best with old west analogies so it fits. ODU has everything but a dependable swish man. He knows it. The Monarchs will also have to deal with the mental aspect of being the league favorite, but there will be ups and downs. That isn’t as easy as it sounds.
Northeastern: The Experience Paradox. What? Four senior starters and Chais Allen, who is a junior but has started all 64 NU games since he walked onto campus. After that, Bill Coen has Baptiste Bataille and a bunch of freshmen. The Huskies have no sophs or juniors with “some experience.” However that should allow for some youthful enthusiasm.
Mason: “At first base, Bugs Bunny. Shortstop, Bugs Bunny. Third base, Bugs Bunny.” You know you remember that one. same holds true here. Mason has a ridiculous amount of talent, but a lot of the same guy. Pearson, Morrison, Foster, Birdsong, new guys, etc. Don’t split hairs. You know what I mean. They might need a specialist at some point.
Georgia State: Five Alarm Chili. Rod Barnes admitted his seniors didn’t lead as much as he’d like last year, and that hurt them. Stat of note: the Panthers won five of their last seven games and the only two losses were to VCU. It took awhile for the ingredients to cook down, but look out this year.
UNCW: John Fields of Dreams. The ECU transfer is 6-9, 235 pounds and can block shots and rebound like a maniac. Benny Moss is thrilled someone can defend the post and it changes things. It better: opponents shot 59% of their two point shots last season. Name to remember: Ahmad Grant.
Delaware: Hakim McCullar of Dreams. The Rhode Island transfer, aw, just read the above about needing a big man and getting one.
William & Mary: I Pick Tsetse. You know the scene in Madagascar 2 when Alex mimes raising his hand above and below his mouth, alternating a smile with a frown? That’s this squad. There are parts, very good parts, but are they 10th place parts (frown) or fifth place parts (smile)?
Towson: This is The Year. Yeah, but every year is the year. Is this the year when the year is this?
VCU: Don’t Buy the Hype, But Buy the Hype. Anybody that tells you they know what VCU is going to do is lying. They still have top 2 overall talent in the conference, but no Maynor and a new coach will be very interesting to watch. Basketball fans should enjoy watching this season unfold.
Hofstra: Jenkins? Is he still on the team? The Chuckster is going to do his thing, but I cannot wait to see GWash and Mikey Szabo in the paint, as well as Nat Lester–who I’m told is bench pressing more than 300 pounds. and of course My Man Corny. It’s the other guys.